Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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