I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
