I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
