hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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