AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
MIDGETS
????
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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