I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
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I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
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If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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