Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
