What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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