is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
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I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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