i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize