Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize