"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize