I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
