i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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