If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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