Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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