we have officially lost it.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
