I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
being pregnant is like rehab
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize