Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize