Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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