So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
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What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
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So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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