Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
So vagazzling was a success
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
