and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize