Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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