Rock
Scissors
Fuck
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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