I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Randomize