I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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