the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
