On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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