I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize
