Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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