So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize
