he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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