Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize