2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
