Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
