Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(224): View more from Illinois

She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on

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(224): She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on http://tfl.nu/bnaa

Replies (24) Good night (681) Bad night (5176)
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(559): View more from California

So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best

(310): View more from California

and??

(559): View more from California

Cake is only good when you eat it

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(559): So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best (310): and?? (559): Cake is only good when you eat it http://tfl.nu/ifoq

Replies (19) Good night (972) Bad night (4355)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand

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(908): i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand http://tfl.nu/4jef

Replies (17) Good night (5342) Bad night (1047)
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(404): View more from Georgia

He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.

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(404): He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me. http://tfl.nu/t7d5

Replies (19) Good night (1590) Bad night (5619)
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(518): View more from New York

i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.

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(518): i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that. http://tfl.nu/4wam

Replies (1) Good night (960) Bad night (2613)
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(818): View more from California

Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob

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(818): Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob http://tfl.nu/xjl4

Replies (24) Good night (4756) Bad night (1125)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight

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(412): I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight http://tfl.nu/88wf

Replies (8) Good night (3653) Bad night (958)
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(805): View more from California

We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.

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(805): We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits. http://tfl.nu/3ys3

Replies (17) Good night (1131) Bad night (2657)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.

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(603): He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car. http://tfl.nu/1mzx

Replies (50) Good night (8036) Bad night (944)
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(205): View more from Alabama

Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.

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(205): Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know. http://tfl.nu/g7ht

Replies (6) Good night (3593) Bad night (907)
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(530): View more from California

Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking

(530): View more from California

That could use a little rephrasing

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(530): Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking (530): That could use a little rephrasing http://tfl.nu/xfz9

Replies (5) Good night (1882) Bad night (795)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.

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(402): I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody. http://tfl.nu/us3z

Replies (5) Good night (701) Bad night (997)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".

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(603): From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon". http://tfl.nu/l6av

Replies (7) Good night (1669) Bad night (964)
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(812): View more from Indiana

You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup

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(812): You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup http://tfl.nu/kydl

Replies (4) Good night (401) Bad night (576)
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(925): View more from California

Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.

(1-925): View more from California

Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.

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(925): Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles. (1-925): Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive. http://tfl.nu/bo4j

Replies (1) Good night (493) Bad night (285)

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