dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize