Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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