This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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