she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize