If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
