Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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