So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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