the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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