Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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