I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
