two words: eviction party
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I FOUND THE LEGS
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
