I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I think weed is turning my hair brown
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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