i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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