I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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